Monday, December 27, 2010
Antichrist-mas
On Boxing Day we battle (Wrath) crowds of crazed (Anger) shoppers desperately trying to obtain (Lust) a better deal (Greed) than everyone else (Envy/Pride); or we just sit around watching football (Sloth). So, why in Hell do we celebrate Boxing Day?
Friday, December 3, 2010
Snow Plow
I woke to the sound of a slow plow blade scraping the asphalt on the road outside my hotel room window. It sounds a little like a jet engine. I lay in bed for awhile wondering how long it would be until they plowed the road next to my job site and I think about how much damage snow plows have done to the site over the years. I plan my escape route in case I see a snow plow bearing down on me and then get up for breakfast. Pancakes.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Vernon

I've been staring at the screen trying to write about Vernon, but nothing seems to...
It snows here in winter, which is great for skiing, but not so great for work. We've been lucky so far; once when I was out here the snow plows buried the door to our equipment building and I had to dig it out by hand. Heavy, brown, slushy, snowplow snow.
They have a bike park nearby, but it is closed for the season. This makes me feel sad.
I had dinner at Kelly O'Bryan's. It's a very Irish sounding place and there is a shamrock on the menu, but the waitresses wore kilts which is very Scottish. I thought "maybe the waitresses all attend the same Irish Private School and they came to work straight from class", but I noticed a waiter wearing one too; and it pushed the thought out of my head; and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get it back in.
I'm staying at the Village Green Hotel and my toilet has a square seat. This time I decided to unpack my suitcase and put my clothes in the dresser. It is a single deep drawer which makes unpacking very easy. Clothes in the dresser; what a trip.
....come to mind.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Flying Baby
Someone cut in front of my wife who was next in line for a bathroom stall at Pearson International Airport in Toronto. She exchanged horrified looks with a girl who was sporting a purple mohawk and also waiting in line. A 50-something woman was rude enough to disgust a girl with a purple mohawk. This sums up our overall experience at YYZ.
When you fly with a baby they make you hold her in your lap because she is too small to wear a seatbelt and they haven't come up with a better idea. Think about it; if you held your baby in your lap while you were driving in a car, an angry mob would appear and stone you to death. You're not even supposed to jog with a baby strapped into a jogging stroller with a 5 point harness until she's a year old. HEADLINE: "YUMMY MOMMY CRASHES INTO SWAMP, KILLING ALL PASSENGERS ON BOARD, WHILE JOGGING AT THE BEACH". Maybe air travel is safer than jogging.
On the plane a flight attendant instructed me to hold the baby against my chest during take off and landing, but you can't hold your carry on baggage against your chest during take off and landing. For the safety of passengers please stow carry on baggage under the seat in front of you. After all you wouldn't want carry on baggage flying around the plane, someone might get hurt.
Luckily the plane didn't crash on take off, oxygen masks didn't drop from overhead, and I wasn't struck by a flying infant. During the flight I held the baby on my lap, as instructed, and she seemed to be having a fine time. Then without warning and very rapidly, the guy in front of me lowered his seat back and struck my daughter on the head. Fun times over.
When you fly with a baby they make you hold her in your lap because she is too small to wear a seatbelt and they haven't come up with a better idea. Think about it; if you held your baby in your lap while you were driving in a car, an angry mob would appear and stone you to death. You're not even supposed to jog with a baby strapped into a jogging stroller with a 5 point harness until she's a year old. HEADLINE: "YUMMY MOMMY CRASHES INTO SWAMP, KILLING ALL PASSENGERS ON BOARD, WHILE JOGGING AT THE BEACH". Maybe air travel is safer than jogging.
On the plane a flight attendant instructed me to hold the baby against my chest during take off and landing, but you can't hold your carry on baggage against your chest during take off and landing. For the safety of passengers please stow carry on baggage under the seat in front of you. After all you wouldn't want carry on baggage flying around the plane, someone might get hurt.
Luckily the plane didn't crash on take off, oxygen masks didn't drop from overhead, and I wasn't struck by a flying infant. During the flight I held the baby on my lap, as instructed, and she seemed to be having a fine time. Then without warning and very rapidly, the guy in front of me lowered his seat back and struck my daughter on the head. Fun times over.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Most Canadian City

It is the birthplace of Confederation and the site of the first organized hockey game.

It is where Canadian National Rock & Roll Anthem writing The Tragically Hip hail from.
It was the first city to be named the Capital of Canada and is the location of prestigious Queens University.

It is the location of Fort Frontenac which survived a 2 month Iroquois seige in 1688 during the Iroquois War and was later captured by 3000 British Troops in 1758 during the Seven Years War. Destroyed and rebuilt both times, the fort is still occupied by the Canadian military to this day.

This most Canadian of Cities is Kingston, Ontario.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
First Flight

It went pretty well. She was easily entertained by all the people moving about on the plane, but all the action also kept her from one of her naps. By the time we landed she was exhausted and since all those distracting passengers and flight attendants were in their seats, I laid her across my lap while the plane taxied. She fell asleep just before the "seat belt" light went off and everyone jumped up to exit the plane. I guess a 5 second nap is better than none.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)